Saturday, August 2, 2008

Overbearing

OVERBEARING--the hated word from my childhood. It's what my mother called me on a regular basis--usually when I asked about a thing too many times, when I did an irritating thing too many times, when I was obnoxious too many times. And apparently I was overbearing a lot.

I think I am still overbearing sometimes. But now as an adult I have learned to observe people's reactions very carefully. If I see someone's eyes glazing over or their expressions changing, or I get a clue that they are not appreciating or agreeing or liking what I'm saying, I will often modify my behavior or message. That's partly the pleaser coming out in me, and it's partly my spiritual gift of mercy, and it's partly survival instinct. That's doesn't mean I change the truth of my message, but I may change how I'm presenting it.

The trouble is that sometimes I'm so tactful, I don't get my message across. This is pretty irritating to me when it happens. But at least I'm not as overbearing as I once was. I think.

8 comments:

Julie said...

You don't bother me. :)

Kay Day said...

I think maybe I am too, although nobody actually used the word.

Julie told me that she and mom used to think I would probably not get married because no guy could handle me because I'm so much Kay. Or something like that.
Watch. They'll deny it now.

Julie said...

I don't deny it at all!! I stand behind my statement, I just didn't know God had made someone like B. So I'm not really wrong. :)

Momstheword said...

Now Kay, I don't remember saying that! Yes, Queen, that was one of your mother's favorite words. Would it be fair to say she could be rather overbearing at times? God love her.

QOTW said...

You all tickle me. Maybe I got some of my "overbearingness" from my mother. I inherited that and many other mostly fine qualities.

Momstheword said...

There are a lot worse things than being like your mother! She was my hero and mentor and I miss her a lot.

Jen said...

I'm gonna say that I'm glad I didn't receive that overbearing gene. I just got all of the other stuff...loudmouth, obnoxious, guilt. Man, if those aren't some great qualities.

QOTW said...

I miss my mom a lot too.

Jen, you got genes I never even heard of. Obnoxious my eye!! Loudmouth my foot!! Ha!