Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Married for a Long, Long, Long Time

June 10 is my anniversary!

I got married when I was 23. The first several years were a little rough because even though I was a REALLY nice person, I wasn't good at taking care of someone else or in letting someone else be the boss.

After those first few years, the next several were pretty rough (I didn't stutter). My husband and I are opposites in many ways--he has the spiritual gift of prophecy (seeing things in black and white) and I have the spiritual gift of mercy (seeing all sides and the motivations); he likes only certain foods (although he has changed a lot over the years) and I like nearly everything (it's a sad, sad thing); he doesn't really like to plan ahead on some things, and I do. We have different views on many things. He can be confrontational and I have a very hard time with being confrontational.

But guess what? We have survived as a married couple for 36 YEARS. I am amazed. My husband has been a wonderful man. He has been a great provider. He's been a good father and husband. He was always good to his parents and to mine, and he has always been generous to me. (36 YEARS!)

I think some keys to our long marriage are these: forgive and let irritations go; remind yourself of your commitment; have fun and make each other laugh; be tolerant; remember the things you have in common (for us children, church work, music, our families, all these years of memories, dogs, cats, cars, suppers, bills, trips, arguments). We have made each mad (not so much anymore), we have argued, laughed, cried, shared and helped each other through very hard times. He is my rock.



Kay said...

is it your actual anniversary today?

Congratulations! Not many people hang in there that long anymore.
You two are a pair and you would not be who you are without each other. You complete each other. You are the stars in each other's eyes. You light up each other's lives. You are the peanut butter and he is the jam. You go together like peas and carrots. Without him, you would just be P and without you, he would would just be G and what's the fun in that?

Julie said...

That is a long, long , long time. He is an amazing man to have survived our family for so many years...it must be love. :)
Really, I am very happy for you to have both grown so close and to have remained together in a world that incourages people to serve self rather than others. Kay is right, but I would say he was the peanut butter and he was the jam. Kay is so silly sometimes.

Julie said...

I mean YOU are the jam. Her silliness has transfered to me somehow. Whatever shall I do?

QOTW said...

My actual anniversary is today, June 10.

I think maybe he is more the iguana and I'm the cauliflower. He's the thorn and I'm the flea.

Julie, I thought you were saying he was the peanut butter AND the jam, so I must be the bread.

Thanks for the comments.

Jen said...

Ridiculous. You all are ridiculous.

Happy anniversary. Thanks for being a great example of a married couple. I love you guys!

Momstheword said...

Boy, do I remember that wedding! My precious daughter, Kay, was a flower girl and I have a picture of her almost twisting the arm off the other little girl, because she was hanging onto her hand so tightly. My other precious daughter, Julie, caused my cousin Floyd a litt concern, which he pointed out to me. Apparently Julie was standing in the pew looking back toward Floyd, and, drew some attention because she was stuffing a piece of tissue up her nose. I was so proud! So the fact that your marriage has lasted this long says that your wedding day was PERFECT, right? Didn't you make your own wedding dress?

QOTW said...

I did make my own wedding dress. Very simple and pretty.

Robin said...

Congratulations and Happy Anniversary! Beautiful post! Something all soon to be marrieds and already marrieds should read. Marriage isn't cake, but it can be much more nourishing if we give the driver's seat to God... I'm still learning... Happy Anniversary!

QOTW said...

Thanks for all the kind comments. You are lovely people!